Is it possible to be kind and courteous all the time




















See the full definition for courteous in the English Language Learners Dictionary. Nglish: Translation of courteous for Spanish Speakers. Britannica English: Translation of courteous for Arabic Speakers. Subscribe to America's largest dictionary and get thousands more definitions and advanced search—ad free! Log in Sign Up. Save Word. Definition of courteous. Other Words from courteous courteously adverb.

Choose the Right Synonym for courteous civil , polite , courteous , gallant , chivalrous mean observant of the forms required by good breeding. Examples of courteous in a Sentence There was no doubt that his stubbornly held and trenchantly expressed views—his trenchancy always tempered, however, by his gently courteous manner—contributed significantly to his unpopularity … — Simon Winchester , The Man Who Loved China , … she has seen generations of boys come and go, some well groomed and courteous , others rough and uppity … — Julian Barnes , New Yorker , 5 Mar.

Recent Examples on the Web Always affectionate, always courteous … just a picture of domestic bliss. First Known Use of courteous 13th century, in the meaning defined at sense 1. He heard I wanted to meet him and immediately walked across the room -- where I was waiting to see if it would be OK --to say hello. The fact I remember how gracious he was tells you everything you need to know about the impression he made.

In short, courteous people never big-time you; instead, they always make you feel big time. You're at an event. You introduce yourself to me as Christopher. We talk. Within minutes, I'm calling you Chris. Or C-Dog. Or C-man. Maybe your friends call you C-Dog, but we're not friends yet , and you definitely haven't given me permission to go full diminutive on you Courteous people wait to be asked to use a different, more familiar name.

They call you what you ask to be called, because it's your right to be addressed in the way you wish to be addressed. Anything less would be uncivilized. Some people share incessantly on social media. And maybe you occasionally see what they've been up to. But courteous people don't bring those things up. They talk about sports, they talk about the weather, they talk about how The Walking Dead is a metaphor for life in corporate America, but they only talk about personal subjects the other person actually discloses in person.

Maybe it seems like the person wants everyone to know about a personal subject, but in fact that's rarely the case. So unless his or her social media broadcasts were specifically directed to you, always wait.

Except for shaking hands, they wait to touch you until you touch them. Here's a simple rule: When in doubt, wait for the other person to establish the "touch guidelines. While I know that sounds like no one will ever hug or pat a shoulder or forearm because no one can ever go first, don't worry.

Huggers hug. Patters pat. Backslappers slap. That's what they do. And you can go one step farther: don't pat or squeeze or slap in a good way , even if they are patted or squeezed or slapped. Sure, they hug back Some people don't even realize they're touching you, but they definitely notice when you touch them. That makes them feel uncomfortable, and discomfort is the last way you want other people to feel. An acquaintance's mom died a few weeks ago: you see him and you're not sure whether to bring it up.

Courteous people always bring it up. They keep it simple, like, "I was sorry to hear about your mother. I've been thinking about you and am hoping you're doing OK. Is that awkward? While not all-inclusive, check out the list below for some common signs:.

If you find yourself constantly saying that you're sorry and apologizing for things that aren't even in your control, it's a sign you might be too polite. For a lot of people who are people pleasers, it's tempting to "fix" or "solve" situations by cleaning them up as quickly as possible, but it's important to recognize when it's not actually your job to do so. Constantly apologizing can be exhausting, especially if you begin to internalize all of these issues as "your fault," even if they aren't.

If you find yourself wondering if you're too polite , a great hypothetical is to think about how you act in a group dynamic. Do you find yourself failing to network because you feel rude inserting yourself into a conversation?

Do you end up barely getting a word into friendly conversations because you don't know how to redirect the talk back to yourself or your day? These are signs that your considerateness of others may be coming at the expense of silencing your own voice and hiding your personality. When someone puts pressure on you to do them a favor and you're not OK with doing it, it's always a tricky balance to get out of it without feeling like you're at risk of offending them.

If you're prone to being overly polite, though, it's likely you never really get out of doing someone a favor — even when you don't want to or might not be able to — because, well, you always agree to them. Even if your polite response is positive in the moment, it has the potential to lead to loads of resentment and passive-aggressive feelings down the line.

It's also a surefire way to drain your energy. Whether it's that you really need to catch up on sleep or that you simply want an afternoon to yourself, if you're too polite, you may experience feeling like it's impossible to say "no" to people. But putting your own needs last over and over can not just be bad for you emotionally, but also physically: Studies show that when people experience chronic stress and fatigue , they're more likely to sleep poorly, have less energy, and feel more irritable overall.



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